I will start by saying this "Man today, is in trouble!" He is in trouble of identity. He doesn't know who he is. This is seen in various statistics. Most criminals are men. Drug addicts! Infact, statistics prove it that when a woman goes against the law, more often than not a man is involved, and in most of this cases, the man is the cause
What is the cause of this crisis? Why do we have more men who are unable to hold homes ? Beat up wives, abuse children, never stay at home? are drunkards, drug addicts and outright criminals
Why? Confusion! That's the answer, and I will explain.
The environment the man now finds himself is so strange to what he was used too. Workplace used to be known as man's world. Today career women are everywhere. Men used to boast of 'working' and providing for the home.
Well, the woman works now too. Majority of sisters online tonight are students, graduates or post graduates; getting ready or trained to work. The man, whose identity used to be in working is now confused!!
Before, man defined himself by strength. His muscles worked intimidation. If the woman misbehaves, he quantized her with a slap. But today, even the most backward of societies frown at women abuse. What a man was once applauded for now has a criminal tag called domestic violence.
The man is more confused.What should he do, who is he? How does he come with this fast changing world. Most men get frustrated, angry and dejected.Others out of very serious confusion just decide to become a female... they call it gay!
Now when a man is in this state, everything downstream from him suffers. The woman first, becomes a victim of domestic violence. Children get abandoned and infact abused The society becomes corrupt. What is the answer to man's confusion?
Understanding of Purpose!
Man's identity is in his purpose. Man had always tried to define himself by what he does instead of by who he is!
We are getting serious now, introduction is over, so pay attention.
Purpose established function. Purpose defines function. To find your function or role without knowing who you are is to call for calamity and frustration. So man had been defined by roles attached to manhood!
Unfortunately these roles were very dynamic (subject to change) depending on the times, the culture or the tribe. Roles can change, purpose can't. Man has been defined by culture, religion, TV heroes, local superstars etc for a long time, by what they do,
Let's look at some of the effects of time over the roles given to men
In the olden days, men and women had their roles shapened by biology and circumstance.
Biology: woman had a womb, she should make babies and cater for them
Biology: man was stronger, he should go and fetch food.
Environment: conditions were harsh. Wild animals were everywhere. The woman was fragile, she needed to be protected! The man was strong, he could protect. You see that?
The roles were well spelt out. When a woman and a man come together, there was no question of love. The question the woman asked was, can you provide for me and protect me?
The man asked, can you make babies?If you told a woman, I love you
She heard, 'i got strength, no lion will touch you'
Do you know some men are still living this stone age life.
In the stone age their was no time for romance, no time to say , oh dear you look good this morning. A lion could grab your neck before you were through. You were always vigilante, 'watching and praying' lol. No time to go for walks. Cinema!?!? Stone age. Common man!
Some men today, still think all the woman needs is money, roof overher head and food. Stone age men. No time for communication, intimacy etc. When they talk, they mention
How much they got and can give. They just work!!! And the woman is a baby factory
In modern times!
Are you with me?
Biology: woman, there are contraceptives, 2 babies and they are done.
There are nannies, they don't need to take care of babies at home any more!
The man: does not need to protect her from wild animals, she got 911, and if you are in Nigeria, you have "Olode" (Night watch men).
She does need him to be primarily bringing in food and money alone. She works too. The man can't say I am a bread winner, the woman will say, well I have a bakery!!!
The roles now are less well defined. The roles used to be the basis of respect. Now the roles are gone, the respect too.
You see why there are so many divorces? The woman feels sufficient in herself, she can get everything she needs. The man feels ignored and irrelevant!
Problem is, they defined each other by role rather than by purpose. If you as a man define yourself by the traditional view of what a man should be, the day you fall short, frustration starts.
Your best bet is to hold on to Gods ideal! God must define man's purpose not tradition!
Gen 1:26-28
God created man in his image and likeness!
God is a Spirit. John 4:24
So the man he CREATED must have been a spirit too!
You must listen to this to get it.
When God created man, he created a spirit being. The physical substance would come later! That creation is called man.
Vs 27 says. Male and female created he them.
That is God created MAN. and packaged him inside a container called MALE AND FEMALE. Both containers have MAN in them!
So, creation is different from formation. God created man. Then formed the male and female. Male formed from the soil directly. Female formed from male (soil indirectly)
You see light? Let me see if you are following.
In Gen 2:8, it says God put the man he had FORMED in the garden. Which man is he referring to?
What do you think?
Man (spiritual being)
Man (male)
Man (female)
Which one?
Good, Well, male man. So when we say man in this context we mean male man. What is the purpose of the male man?
It is seen in three things.
His priority.
His position.
His assignment.
His priority or precedence. He came first. That means he is the foundation. Upon him the other structures will be. But he came first. The priority in a building is the foundation. The strength of the foundation determines the load it will bear
Apostle Paul says foundations can be people. 1 Cor 3:11. The male man is the foundation of everything the home, the family or the society will be.
Number 1:
He is foundation!
A real man is the one upon whom a woman, a society , a family can build
Real men don't run away when things get tough
They stay! Cracked men are cracked foundations, they make cracked society. It does not matter your muscle mass, if a woman can't rest and build on you, you are not a man, you are a mess
Have you heard that the family is the foundation of the society?
It is not true! The man, the male man is the foundation of the society.
Because foundation is the lowest thing possible in a structure. If you say family is society's foundation, then what is family's foundation?
Man!!! Lowest underlying substructure. A society is as strong, as upright, as its men
The opposite is true too. Damaged men, damage women. Damaged men, damage children. Men, go get yourself a strong foundation.
Your woman does not need you to escape gorillas anymore, she wants to be able to look into your eyes and say, there goes MY ROCK!
Are you getting blessed?
The man was designed to be the rock upon which every other thing rests. If things can't rest on you, if people can't depend on you, if your woman can't trust you, you are not a man. Stop talking!!!!
So there goes no 1. The man is a foundation.
Men, are you listening?
How many men do we have in the house?
Say together with me...
I am dependable
I am strong
I am faithful
I will stay true
So men, before you build a home, be a rock. Sisters don't build your house on a sand. Test the brother, be sure he is a rock!
Jesus said homes built on sand will collapse! You won't collapse in Jesus name!
Brothers... go solidify!!! That's your purpose! When she cries, be her shoulder. She wouldn't be there if you didn't need help. She came as your help meet. Don't frustrate your help. Some men wonder why more help don't come to them.
Number 2:
The positioning is very strategic
Eden means pleasure. In Gods presence there are pleasure forevermore. Eden is a type of Gods presence on earth, from which Adam was to operate. Adam was not designed to move around from Eden, he was to move Eden around. Man is designed to function in the presence of God. The presence of God is man's true atmosphere.
A real man by God's definition is one who is functioning in Eden, God's presence!?? Manufacturers put equipments where they will function best. A car steering cannot be on the floor!!!!!
Man was put on the best environment for optimum performance and delivery. If you put a fish outside water, it wriggles, onlookers may think it is excited! Lies! It is struggling and gasping.
Outside their Eden, it may look like men are 'enjoying life'. Lies! They are struggling and gasping! Outside Gods presence man becomes an uncontrollable beast. Brother, go get Gods presence. Real men carry Gods presence around.
How different this is from the Hollywood or Nollywood idea of a real man? Some men think they will do fine without Gods presence, funny! Think about it, the first thing God gave man was not a wife, nor a job, nor a command! It was His presence.
You need his presence
Forget girls, gold and glory. I.e. women, money and fame. Go get a presence! You have no business with a girl, when you don't have the presence. Your power and purpose as a male man comes from the presence.
Lastly, his assignment defines his purpose
He was put in the garden to till the ground, I.e. to cultivate, grow, groom, and keep it.Notice by this time the woman had not yet appeared! A man is not defined by the presence of a woman!
These things define him, woman or not! If you are not a man, before meeting a woman, it won't make any difference how many women you meet. Infact you just might as well become one! To cultivate the garden, means to grow or groom the garden!
Women birth things, Men grow things.
Men grow the things women birth. If things don't grow, get cultivated with you, think again about calling yourself a man.
Did you notice God himself had to make the garden? There was no woman around! He later put the man there to put out the weed! Women birth, men grow. Strange today how men want women to be in charge of training and growing the children.
That's a man job.
We groom! That's why we are the groom. Her husbandman
Men, are you there?
You don't become a groom when you are going to the altar to 'kiss the bride'.
You become a groom the day you start learning to grow things.
Men don't become grooms. The groom becomes a man
Men, grow things.
If you are in a relationship grow your woman. If you are married grow your woman. If the only growth she is experiencing is provided tommy (pregnancy) every year, you are not a groom!
I won't say what you are!!
Under Cultivating the land is teaching!
A man is a teacher. Men don't get angry when people don't get things, they teach. Real men teach! Eve was not there when God gave instructions about the fruit to Adam, God expected Adam to teach her. The burden of educating Eve was not on God but on Adam,
Adam was the leader! Men take the lead.
When Adam messed up and God said where are you, he was asking a question of position. You are not in front Adam! Men, be in front!
Lead! No plan for tomorrow. Man, get into Eden and get directions. Teach it. Take the lead in executing it! When real men say we are fasting they take the lead!
Real men protect! I wonder why I would let a serpent talk to my wife!
God said that Adam guy should keep the garden (that included everything and everyone in it) He didn't keep Eve, he exposed her. Real men don't expose the precious ones in their lives. They protect. In prayer and in watching.
Devil comes and start talking with your woman, tell him hello Sir! Talk to me, now get out! The fellow was there, doing nothing. Salivating at the thought of apple. Real men don't exchange destinies for food. Real men understand things of worth and value.
Finally
Real men cultivate... they work!
Because they have to provide
The man is to keep the garden , including the woman! To keep your woman, and your home, you work.
Adam didn't start working as an emergency when Eve came. He had always been working. Work Sir!!
Work is not a product of the curse, they had not fallen when God instructed Adam to work.Work is God instruction. There is dignity in work.
If you follow these things, it will be well with you.
Now listen. If your woman is working, don't get intimidated. Teach her! If she likes let her earn USA's budget as her salary, you are her foundation, her visioneer (presence man) and her groom ( teacher, cultivator, leader)
When Men feel intimidated they have not been doing one of these duties dictated by purpose correctly. A well pastored woman is not braggadocios
She submits
Problem is men don't Pastor but they want results. Now if your wife earns more than you, rejoice! You still work, and do your part as a provider. Remember, she is your help meet! Helper!
Just that now the helper is doing more than the main man. That's not a problem. Infact I think it's kinda cool thing (smiles).
The Holy Spirit is our helper, but he has more capacity than we do. Can you earn more than the Holy Spirit? God gave man helpers forever.
In the Old testament he said it is not good for man to be alone, gave him a wife. In the new testament, Jesus said, I will not leave you alone, he sent the Holy Spirit.
Both helpers! Well, I like help. Don't run from help. Enjoy help
I pray for you that God's Grace, Peace and Mercy be on you. Amen!
Details of the Teaching:
By: Pastor (Dr) Sam Adewuyi, SMR God's Love Tabernacle, Akure, Nigeria
At: Family Impact Online Conference, January 28, 2017, 9pm till 11pm WAT
Details of the Teaching:
By: Pastor (Dr) Sam Adewuyi, SMR God's Love Tabernacle, Akure, Nigeria
At: Family Impact Online Conference, January 28, 2017, 9pm till 11pm WAT
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